911 and Other Dangerous Information Kids Learn at School

I have two Devon Rex cats. Mr. March affectionately calls them "That Stupid Cat" and "That Idiot Cat" He has other names but I am trying to keep this a family friendly blog.

If you don't know anything about Devon Rex they are one of three breeds of cats that are considered hypoallergenic. While not truly hairless they are a little on the ummm, bald side. They also have huge bat like ears. Oh, and they are very active. Imagine your playful kitten on speed. You almost get the idea.

Idiot Cat likes to get on the roof. I don't know why, it may be because of the four chihuahuas, or it may be because she is trying to catch birds. I'm sure in her pea sized brain it makes sense. She then proceeds to howl, and howl, and howl, until she remembers how to get down.

Well, she was up there this morning howling away when Jo decided to make breakfast. Jo, my concerned animal lover, rushed outside to help her.

I could hear her calling, along with the rest of the neighborhood, "Common Idiot, common, just jump to me, I'll catch you. Here Idiot, Here girl, I'll catch you."

I'm laughing to myself. There is no way that cat is going to jump, but it is pretty funny listening to Jo call her.

Jo comes in and tells me the cat is on the roof and needs to be rescued. I remind her that the cat gets up there all the time and will get down on her own.

Jo goes back outside and calls some more.

Then she comes again, "Mom where is a ladder, I need to get Stupid Cat." Tell her again the cat will be fine and to go eat her breakfast.

Jo goes back outside and proceeds to move a table over by the roof. She then puts a chair on top of the table. Luckily, I pass by a window and see the "ladder" she is building.

"Jo, you can't get up on that. It's not safe. Stupid Cat will get down when she is ready."

Jo comes in and gets focused on breakfast. Thinking she is distracted, I head into the bathroom and take a shower.

Beth comes running in "Mom, Mom, Jo just called 911 and told them Stupid Cat is stuck on the roof."

I jump out of the shower, grabbing clothes as fast as I can. Imagining the police or fireman are about to show up at my house any second asking why a child is at home calling 911 during school hours. I can see the evening news now "Homeschooled Child Calls 911 to Rescue Cat"

Thankfully a brief, but humiliating, conversation with the 911 dispatcher prevents any civil servants from pulling into my driveway.

At this moment I am thinking less then kind thoughts about those preschool teachers who think it is so smart to teach kids to call 911 in an "emergency"

Yes, Stupid is still on the roof and she is still howling!